Shadow

You could say we all have a non integrated shadow side. Triggered behaviour may be a great example of what happens when you do not work on integration. You may experience 2 sides the conscious side and the resentful, cruel, mean tantrumy, angry side. Not integrated in. Instead they switch between each other. One rational one irrational. One skilled, one unskilled. One an adult and in control and another a young one out of control…

I could look at the younger me, not only did this happen to me , that is how it is perceived, as happening to me with me out of control to it. As if the conscious self were the I. The triggered self was a swamp of undifferentiated  emotions. – over there –  Only untangling with much time, observation, love, skill and practice. 

Years of impotence, uncertainty, unsafety and helplessness, yielding years of adrenaline, flash anger, separation and loneliness. That didn’t quite match the situation. 

Fear having nothing to hold onto, no foundation of safety to support the organism. No way to ground out the fear and differentiate what is current danger and what is past danger. What is needed now? And do I have the skills to resource it? Instead it is chemicals in the body, yelling ALERT, fight, flight, freeze. Mac truck coming!

Even when the person gets differentiation the chemicals in the body may still flow at high volume.

The person may not have learned many developemental skills. 

The right to safety, certainty, clarity, calm… may not be wired in.

The ability to communicate from these rights. Being able to notice and say what I need and want. May need waking up or learning.

The ability to self regulate

please add any of your own insights

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